duality

lately the sun has been calling out to me. i’m baffled at this because i’ve spent a lot of effort establishing an entire personality off of loving cloudy gray weather. but every time i’ve seen it this past month, i haven’t been able to keep the smile off my face like my fifth grade crush just looked my way. entire day made. i’d like to think this newfound love is an indication that it’s not just dark here anymore. there’s light in the depth.

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each time i find myself creating new love is another time that i learn i never really lost it. it exists in me forever, pushing the boundaries of my heart until i am heavy and empty at the same time.

i deserve the love i want. i deserve clarity and certainty. the next time i fall in love, i won’t need to convince myself of it. it will just be the plain truth. i won’t need to write roundabout prose

no one’s perfect but you are very good